Self Esteem
by Celaviaivilo
Summary: Have you ever in a situation where something had never bugged you in any way but later in a very important moment, it seemed to be a very big problem? Just like what I'm feeling now. He laughed. "This is not funny, Roxas!" I shouted at him, flustered. "I'll help you. You'll be in whatever figure you want in no time." Rated T for theme


**Self Esteem**

**Disclaimer: Square Enix**

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Have you ever in a situation where something had never bugged you in any way but later in a very important moment, it seemed to be a very big problem?

Just like what I'm feeling now.

Does my tummy really look that big all this time?

"Namine, are you done yet?" I heard a very familiar voice. It was Roxas, my husband.

"I'll be there in a sec," I answered nervously.

Currently, I am in a bathroom of a luxurious hotel suite, looking into the full-body mirror hanging on the wall. I just married the love of my life, Roxas. The guy who gives me butterflies every time he touches me. The one who made my heart thumps faster every time he says my name. My soul mate. The one man who is currently waiting for me outside the door.

I love him, so much.

This is our first day. We went to Destiny Island as our honey moon destination. It's a well known tropical island with beautiful beaches and the clear blue sea, with coconut trees and perfect weather. A perfect place to spend our time together, just the two us.

Being the prankster he was, Roxas had secretly bought me two-piece swimming attire. The bikini was colored light blue. It was plain and simple but it was the kind of clothing I didn't really enjoy wearing in public. I always wear one piece. Even if it was personally picked by my husband.

But, as usual, he had convinced me wearing it with that oh-so-adorable puppy eyes and I gave in, yet again. So, here I am. The swimsuit on my body. It was too revealing and too sexy for my liking. We're going to one of the beach near our hotel, with me in the bikini.

And we're back to why I'm actually panicking right now.

I never really cared how my body looks like, not until now. I just realized how big the blob of fat in my tummy. It's not too big, but it's big enough for me to wince every time I see them. I turned left, so I could see the side of my body, and winced.

Why didn't I notice this earlier in life?

I heard a knock on the door, "Nami, are you okay in there?" I heard Roxas's voice with a hint of worry. I became more frantic. Did I really spend a lot of time in here? It didn't seem that long. I need to think of something to conceal the fat.

What will Roxas think of me now? This **thing** is not attractive. The only person whose opinion I care about, my own husband. I'm afraid I couldn't please and-

"Namine..."

Darn it. I gave up.

"I'm coming."

I opened the bathroom door with a towel covering my upper body and saw Roxas's bright blue eyes staring deeply into mine. It seems that he had been waiting by the door all this time. He was already in his black swimming trunk with a blue t-shirt covering his upper body. He immediately sensed that something was wrong by the sulky look on my face.

"Nami, what's wrong?" He asked gently, as he stroked my cheek lovingly, eyes still locked on me.

"It's nothing, really," I answered, flashing him a smile. But, he knew better.

"It's the bikini, isn't it? I shouldn't have forced you into this. I'm sor-"

"No! Roxas, it's not that! The swimming suit is fine!"

"So, what is bothering you, Nam?" he asked, almost frustrated. I bit my lower lip and let out a sigh.

"Me... That's what's wrong," I mumbled as I covered my tummy with both hands. He realized my action and glanced at the part I covered.

The response was quick, but not the kind I expected.

"You had a stomach ache? God, why didn't you tell me earlier? Or is it that time of the month again? Nami, I'm so sorry for being inconsiderate," he said quickly, enveloping me into a hug as he stroked my long blond hair.

I blushed from the gesture but then, laughed.

He frowned and released me from the hug, "What's so funny?"

"You," I answered simply as I walked towards the queen-sized bed. I sat on it and signaled him to follow me. He sat next to me and gave me a side hug as he kissed the top of my head.

"I'm worried," I finally said, earning a raised brow from him.

"What?"

"Well, it's just... I just realized, that I'm-"

"Pregnant? But, I haven't even touched you yet! Sure, I kissed you here and there and had some hot making out session, but we even haven't seen each other nak-"

"ROXAS!" I punched him on his arm with a taint of red creeping again to my face. He laughed out loud.

"I'm sorry, Namine. You're just too gullible," he looked at my blushing face and grinned, "and cute."

He gave me a quick peck on my lips, "Okay, all jokes aside. Really, what's wrong?"

I gulped and fiddled with my fingers, indicating I'm nervous.

"It's just... I'm... fat," I spoke, my voice faded after I spoke a word.

"Sorry?" he asked, not understanding what I meant.

"I'm fat, Roxas. Look at this," I stood up and revealed my body behind the towel and my hand. I looked at him worriedly.

After a moment or so passed, he laughed.

"This is not funny, Roxas!" I shouted at him, flustered. I covered my body with the towel again and walked away from him for the bathroom door, but Roxas was faster than me.

"Where do you think you're going, Nam?" he asked in his teasing tone, grabbing my wrist, making me more annoyed.

"Changing back into my clothes, you can go to the beach yourself if you want," I said, obviously pissed.

"I can't do that," he said as he picked me up and carried me to the bed in bride-style. I let out a squeak in shock and flailed in his strong arms. My resistance was futile as he laid me in the middle of the bed and started kissing my neck. Biting and sucking them. I gasped at the action.

"Did you know that I love you so much?" He asked in between kisses. I couldn't answer, every time his lip touches my neck, I couldn't think. My senses were overloaded by his touch.

"Did you know I love you just the way you are?" His hot breath lingered on my neck, making me shiver in pleasure. His soft blond spiky hair tickled my skin. My face red as I let out a shaky breath.

"Did you know that you're beautiful?" He stopped kissing me and looked me straight in the eyes. I stared back, not sure on what to say. A few moments passed with neither of us saying anything. I'm panting from his previous action.

I'm really sensitive to his touch. It was just... intoxicating

"I lied," he said finally.

"What?" I asked in confused and angry tone. Does that mean he doesn't love me and that I'm actually ugly?

"I lied about going to the beach today," he continued.

Oh, so that's what he meant. Wait, what?

"Why?" I never really understand how he thinks. Even after 5 years of knowing him, Roxas is just too unpredictable.

He chuckled in his deep, sexy voice, "Namine, there's no way I'd share the divine beauty in front of me right now in that kind of outfit."

I didn't think my face could go even redder, but it did.

"God, you're so cute," he started kissing my face. From my forehead, my nose, my cheeks, and finally, my lips.

It was gentle and sweet, nothing rushed or passionate. I kissed him back as I played with his hair. His hands on both of my cheeks. He let go of me soon after, too soon for my liking. I grumbled as he backed away.

"I wanted to see you in bikinis, but that doesn't mean I wanted other people to see it, too," he said passionately. "Then, after somehow I convinced you, you're worried because you think you're fat. It was just so funny how insecure you are."

"That doesn't mean you have to laugh," I said, pouting.

"Do you know what I really want to do know?" He said with challenging look. I shook my head lightly in response.

He leaned in closer, his mouth near my ear. He said in his seductive tone, "I want to do you, right here, right now."

"R-ROXAS!" I blushed furiously as I sat up straight. He backed away just in time so we didn't receive any casualties. I looked at him. Confused, embarrassed, happy and frustrated at the same time.

"What? You don't want to?" He asked with a puppy dog eyes.

"N-NO! It's not that. But, in broad daylight?" I answered, rather frustrated.

"Namine, what difference does it make?" He chuckled as he leaned in closer again. "I love you so much, Nami. You, your body, everything, I love you with all my heart. You shouldn't be bothered with it." He hugged me from my back, wrapping me in his strong arm.

"B-but," I tried to reason but was silenced immediately by his kisses on my ears. I moaned.

"Now, now, Nami. You should listen to me," he turned me around so I faced him and gave me a warm smile.

"Promise me you won't be bothered with that kind of trivial matters," he said with a stern look. Hands on my shoulder.

"Okay," I sighed as I wrap my arms around him. I need his warmth, the soothing and calming heat of Roxas.

"Namine, Pop quiz. What should we lose to decrease our weight?" He asked.

I released him and looked at him, confused, "I thought you said it doesn't matter."

"It doesn't. Just answer me," he said with a cheeky grin. I really couldn't understand him what's gone through his mind.

"Umm.. Calories."

"Correct! And what do we do to burn calories?" He asked again with eyes twinkling brightly.

"Do sports?" I answered doubtfully.

"Not the answer I'm looking for." He leaned in to me again and motioned me to lie down on the bed. I did as told. He started kissing me again on my lips. I closed my eyes and relished every moment of it. It amazed me how very good kisser Roxas was. We didn't let go until we realized how vital oxygen was. We parted and inhaled.

"Did you know that every sexual activity burns calories? Even as simple as undressing each other?" He said, panting. I finally understand where this was going.

"I'll help you. You'll be in whatever figure you want in no time," he said mischievously.

Needless to say, he took my breath away.

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_**A/N**_: So this just popped out in my head and I typed it. Simple as that.

I don't know if I managed to pull this off though. This is my first time writing a story with kissing on it. Really, if you check out my other Namixas story _A Night Ride, _you'll understand.

Well, I hope you enjoyed it and please review! :3


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